Not My Child Monday: Principal's Office, Styrofoam Shreds, and Pickled Quail Eggs

It was NOT my oldest child that found himself in the Principal's office today. He was NOT so disruptive outside in the pickup line that he was sent in to the Principal. The Principal did NOT have to escort him to my vehicle so that she could inform me of the situation. He is NOT in big, big trouble. (I actually did NOT say, "Just you wait until your Father gets home!"....which is NOT something I swore I would never say.)

It was NOT my middle child who shoved her 3 year old sister down to the ground for "saying something mean"; that "something mean" has NOT remained a mystery. We all know how vicious 3 year old's speech can be! It was NOT this same middle child that threw an absolute temper fit when asked to go to a time out period for shoving her sister. She did NOT scream "NO!" at me repeatedly all the way down the stairs. This has NOT been an ongoing issue since birth.....or whenever she learned the word "NO!".

My youngest child did NOT make off with a sheet of styrofoam (from the box of a desk that I was upstairs attempting to put together. Does anyone else feel that ready-to-assemble furniture should have the assembly directions/diagram on the outside of the box, so that you can see what you are getting yourself into....before you are actually into it? At the very least...a difficulty level. Come ON!), take it downstairs...where I thought she was looking at her book and playing with her princess figurines.....and rip it into 5 bazillion little pieces. Did you know that it is literally impossible to vacuum and/or sweep styrofoam particles?

Lane is NOT constantly beggin me to eat the pickled quail eggs that my in laws brought as a gift for their visit. It is NOT sitting unopened on the counter. It will NOT probably hit the trash unopened. I do NOT gag at the mere sight of the jar. It does NOT remind me of a jar full of eyeballs. He did NOT point out to my in-laws that the house next door to ours was for sale...and I did NOT have a mild heart attack.

Ava did NOT recently engage in a number of public bathroom infractions....and she most certainly did NOT walk into the stall and wipe an unknown liquid substance from the seat with her fingers. I do NOT have a major loathing of public bathrooms, and I do NOT avoid them at all costs.

Ava did NOT get another sheet of styrofoam out of the trash and obliterate it....for the second time TODAY.....while I sat here writing this post. I am always observant, and know what each of my kids is doing at ALL times. I have eyes ALL OVER my head!

Visit MckMama to see what other angelic children have NOT been doing. I have to go clean up the styrofoam mess that my daughter did NOT just make. Again.